i'm maddie :)
Denver. student. lover of life and laughter.
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photo geek, concert addict, music business hopeful, & did I mention student?
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this place is for me to organize my thoughts, let go, and lose myself in the things i love:
photography. summer. music business. Denver. sunsets. architecture. technology. Batman. instant film. funny things. local music. art. surf&skate. Apple. college. anything & everything that catches my eye.
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I Fight Dragons merch girl on Warped Tour 2012.

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I am living the life I only could have dreamed of...and loving every single second of it.

I’m going to be in California in less than a month.

Just typing that sentence makes me smile from ear-to-ear. Danny, our co-worker Nick, his girlfriend Erica and I are all driving out for 3 days over spring break. Yeah, it’s fast. and yeah, it’s ridiculous to spend more days driving then we’ll be spending in CA, but I want an adventure, i’d love a beach, and i NEED the Vitamin D and sunshine, so what better way than to get all 3? 

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i want to figure out who i am. i want to figure out who i’m becoming.

this past year i’ve constantly felt lost within myself, and lost as to who i am. I’ve lost so many of the things i relied on that defined my identity in high school; i’m at a true loss of exactly who and what i am in this moment of my life.

I know who i want to be, and i know who i’m trying to become, i’m just not entirely sure who i am right now.

this is a strange feeling to have. i want it to go away. But i know that nothing good comes without a fight, so i’m willing to take this time to figure myself out because i know it’s important.

Feb 25th at 9PM / tagged: blog. personal. writing. danny. / reblog / 1 note

weird, weird realization…

last night i couldn’t fall asleep for the life of me. my mind was going 1000mph thinking about the weirdest things, so i pulled up a torrent of “Breaking Dawn” and finally watched it….and realized that Bella has the same string of lights in her room that i have in mine. hahaha. weird! 

i haven’t posted all week…sorry Tumblr-world :( that should change by the end of the night….hopefully!

cleaning my desk and organizing my life first. desk, buy textbooks, maybe laundry, and THEN i can come play with you all :) 

WHY DID RJD2 HAVE TO SELL OUT TONIGHT?

AND WHY DID MY TICKET PURCHASE NOT GO THROUGH ON MY PHONE YESTERDAY??? 

i am officially winning the worst girlfriend/worst sister award tonight, and have two boys pretty bummed out and it’s all my fault. #fail 

TO ANYONE IN AN LDR/ MILITARY SO WHO FOLLOWS ME: Check this out! “PillowTalk”

Check out this INCREDIBLE new product this company in the UK is trying to raise money to start producing, called Pillow Talk. 
Here’s a snippet from their website describing it:
If you’ve ever been separated from your loved one, or been in a long distance relationship, you know how hard it can be. For me, the worst part is always at night. When the busy-ness of the day recedes and it’s time to settle down and go to sleep - that’s when I miss my sweetheart the worst. But imagine if there was a way to feel intimately connected to your significant other, at the time when you need it most…

That’s the premise behind Pillow Talk, an interactive product aimed at bringing long distance lovers together. Each person has a special pillow on their bed and goes to sleep wearing a wireless ring sensor. When one half of the couple goes to bed, the pillow on the other’s bed begins to glow softly. Placing their head on the glowing pillow, one can instantly hear the real-time heartbeat of their lover and feel closely connected, regardless of distance. Click here to see a video of how it all works.

Pillow Talk was a thesis project developed by Joanna Montgomery in 2010. It has won several awards for innovation, and due to the popularity of the concept, has recently secured the funding needed to begin prototyping for production. Those interested in Pillow Talk can follow its development on the Facebook page of Joanna’s newly formed company, Little Riot.”

I know that if i had this while I was dating Brady while he was stationed away for training, this would have made ALL the difference in the world. If you like what you see and think that this would be something you’d use (God knows i still will when i go out on tour!) then please follow the link here to make a donation to their PayPal account to help get this invention off the ground and into production!
There’s sooo many Military SO’s on Tumblr/people in LDR’s that i really think if we all got behind them, we’d get this into production! 

re-blog, donate, and help make this happen, people!  

blehhh.

first week back at school. haven’t seen the boy in a week. want to sleep but can’t. 
AND? Apple’s education announcement is at 10am EASTERN! 8am my time! I can’t get up that early! it’s not possible for me cause i’m lazy and lame!

bleh. thought i’d be waking up with Danny and watching it with him….i think he’s grumpy at me tonight, and no plans have been made, so nevermind! oh well. c’est la vie.

I can’t wait to have this first week back. I just need some rhythm, some normality in my life.
i don’t know what happened to everything, but i feel like nothing’s been right these past 5-7 days. urgh.

I hate you, education system. i also love you, but mainly hate you right now. ha.  

Jan 19th at 1AM / tagged: danny. writing. personal. blog. / reblog / 27 notes

That awkward moment when you meet him for dinner and he knows your upset…

I feel like a bitch. I shouldn’t be upset…but last night I came to the sad realization that my entire relationship with him has been spent being a supportive girlfriend trying to help him push through these IC classes, nothing more and nothing less. He asked me to be his girlfriend 2 months ago after months and months of exclusive dating, just waiting to finally be officially his. In these two months we’ve really been a couple, the only thing he’s had time for, the only thing He’s had to do is finish these classes. And instead of staying focused after the semester ended and just hammering them out, he wasted his whole winter break procrastinating, and now I’ve been in a relationship with incomplete schoolwork for nearly three months, not Danny.

I promised myself when Brady and I broke up that I wouldn’t get in another relationship where I had to put something like that before my relationship. I promised myself I wouldn’t let myself become the one to be putting in 110% into the relationship…and yet somehow here I am again.

Im upset, and I should be allowed to be, but the problem is that unlike the last relationship I was in, this time sacrificing those little things is worth it; He’s worth it. I just hate feeling like this. I want to be mad at him because i HATE the situation we’re in and what he’s done to the start of our relationship, but I just can’t find a way to, and that’s the worst part. I know being mad isn’t the right feeling, and so all I know is right now I’m sad. I’m really really sad. And I had to go and be awkward at dinner and make him feel sad and guilty.

And now I feel terrible, when he should be the one realizing he messed up.

I hate stuff like this. But I love him. So I’ll keep fighting for this, and keep supporting him and being that un-fun girlfriend who nags him about his homework until this is all over with……just in time for next semester to start… :(

Jan 9th at 7PM / tagged: Danny. romance. school. hard. life. writing. personal. blog. / reblog / 64 notes

I am alive and full of new ideas and a new drive i haven’t felt in some time.

there will be a much, much bigger post later. but today, this first day of the new year has me feeling refreshed, re-energized, and full of new purpose. 

i finally feel like me again. that drive that within me that i’ve always had is back. I don’t know if it’s because i’m finally kicking this cold that’s been lingering for what feels like FOREVER, or maybe it’s the promise of a whole new year; 365 brand new days, waiting for me to seize them. i don’t know what it is exactly, but as i was driving home tonight i realized that this year my only resolution this year is to finally finish these great, ambitious things i keep talking about or dreaming of. For once in my life, i want my words to match up with my actions 110%. I want to be the person with the great ideas and the great track record. There’s no point to dreaming of great things unless you have great follow-through. 

Tonight is the start of a new year, a new era of Maddie. 
today begins a new chapter in my life, and i’m very very excited. I know that this year is going to be a huge game-changer for me…I just want to make sure that i do as much as i can to plan and prepare as much possible so i can make the most of all these great things coming my way as i can…..after all, planning is the one thing i already know i do best ;)

off to begin this resolution with finishing a few things that are longggg overdue, and i’ll be back later to map out this quest of a year i have before me.  

Jan 1st at 9PM / tagged: writing. personal. blog. / reblog / 1 note

i also miss my boyfriend.

….who i haven’t seen, and barely spoken to since Sunday night.  it’s understandable, but man does it still suck!

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i miss california.

I called my mom the other night in hopes that i could find some kind of justification to my idea that it’d be okay to buy plane tickets out to LA for a week in January because “they were cheap” (which really means they’re $200 like usual, but it sounds great for airfare when you compare it to other destinations this time of year). The first thing she said to me was “that really isn’t that cheap, honey”…..WHY must she catch me in the act every time??! With that one sentence, i knew she had me then and there. 

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haha, the other day Danny was joking around about what i’d write about him in a diary if i had one. If he ever got smart to this Tumblr site or my Twitter, he might just have his answer…

http://maddielion364.tumblr.com/for-danny/

:)

gahhdamn that boy makes me happy. <3

Dec 14th at 12AM / tagged: me. boys. danny. blog. writing. personal. / reblog / 9 notes

if there’s one thing i’ve learned in the fourteen years i’ve spent as a pawn in the public school system’s game, it’s that when it comes to finals, WHO CARES. What matters is that YOU learned something, and you carry that with you into your future.

who cares if you fail a final??
who cares if you fail that one class?

the best advice i’ve ever heard is from my late uncle, who always told me to “Guess! Be wrong! who cares??” 

shit happens. that might be school, but this is life. this is your life

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